"Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face."

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Holy Pee Batman!

Today was just one of those days. I knew going into it that it was going to be long and also sad, but I did not know it would be downright embarassing as well. I volunteered to assist at the Rio Salado graduation which just happened to be tonight. This means that I knew it was going to be a 14 hour work day for me, but it is once a year so yes, I can handle it. Well - unfortunately it was also the day of the funeral of a dear co-worker of mine who passed away so suddenly that his death has been traumatic for everyone.

So I go to the funeral and it was a Catholic funeral, which I have nothing against Catholics, but it was very different from any funeral I have ever attended. I was emotionally drained from that and then I had to go to the Arizona Law Enforcement Academy to sign up about 50 cadets for college credits. It is always interesting going there because the cadets have to say "yes mam" and "no mam" and "yes sir yes" or "no sir no", to everything.

Well as I am leaving the academy to go back to Rio Salado and then go to the graduation, I realize how much I have to pee and that it can't wait until I get to the school. I rush into the nearest bathroom, throw down my skirt, and yes, you guessed it, I pee. Well I had this skirt on that has a lot of material to it and little did I know that part of my skirt had not come all the way down and it landed in my pee stream. I was like - oh my gosh, what am I going to do, I just peed on myself and I have to go to the Rio graduation? It was about a medium saucer size amount of pee. Which at the time seemed huge. I began to weigh my options, 1-fight traffic and try to rush home, change and make it back to the school by 4:30 (it was already 3:50 and I was at 7th Ave. and Baseline) and also, doing that would involve me having to tell my boss what had happened. OR I can wait for it to dry and hope I don't smell or leave a stain on my skirt. So I call my most trusted co-worker and good friend. I say to her, "once you are done laughing your face off, I need some advice." After she laughed for about 5 minutes she told me to get over it, let it dry and spray some perfume all over myself. I went with her plan and felt gross all night, but hey - you do what you have to do!

So the moral of the story is if you have to go to the bathroom very badly, make sure you get all of your clothes down before you begin peeing.

Love to everyone!

4 comments:

Stacy said...

What a day! So sorry about your co-worker - that is really sad. About your little incident, I'm glad you have enough perpective to have already added it to the "funny stories" file. ugh. I must say that your "medium saucer size amount" description is what had me ROFL! Love you!

Aften said...

You are seriously hilarious...I would have opted for the perfume as well...hope you are well. Love you.

Amy said...

I may never be able to go to the bathroom while wearing a skirt without thinking of your incident.

The Four Moores said...

Thanks for making me laugh!
Love you girl!
Amy